Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Dear Cat

You will note, there is an assembled Christmas tree in the front hall. I wanted to thank you, personally, for leaving it alone for two whole days while there were no decorations on it. You have set such a fine example of willpower, restraint, and refinement in your behavior I cannot help but feel as if I might be able to trust you. In fact, I even pulled out the box of "good" ornaments for use this year.

However, now that it is decorated, I spotted you eyeing it this morning. Please know that each ornament was carefully chosen and placed in an eye pleasing arrangement. It pleases ME. I don’t care where YOU think the ornaments should go. I have also counted them. I know exactly how many are on that tree. I WILL notice if they go missing. The lights, you will notice, are working perfectly. I would prefer they stay that way.

Each package under the tree was wrapped with the utmost care. Do not chew on them. Do not shred the ribbons. Do not use them as launching pads to the upper branches. It is just a small tree and you, um, are not. 

Human family members will be arriving on Christmas Eve and staying until New Years Eve. That is only nine days from now. Surely, you can delay any tree climbing activity, such as you have done in the past, until after that time, Yes?

Good, I'm glad we've got that covered. I'm proud of you. Keep up the good work. I fully trust you will make the right decisions.

IMG_0092

“Yeah. Whatever, lady.”

13 comments:

Denise at Autumn Sky said...

Good Luck with that. LOL

Karen Patrick said...

She ain't buying it, I can tell.

Beth said...

i worked for a lady once who had several cats ... it was christmas time & i kept on hearing this noise ... could not figure it out. so when she got home i mention the noise ... & she said come look ... the cats were going up into the tree climbling around ... lucky no ornaments were falling ... but they did when i was standing there speaking to the lady. it was funny. but so sad about the oranments. lucky the lady was pretty laid back so it did not faze her at all. good luck with that. fingers crossed. (:

Anonymous said...

On the good note -- your brother's cats are gone.

Jean - MN

Jody said...

magical thinking? That cat has an attitude!

Conni said...

Dear Owner,

La-la-la! I can't hear you! La-la-la!!

Love,

The Cat

Nancy K. said...

Perhaps a chicken-wire fence (floor to ceiling) around the tree would help???

You make me smile!

rkbsnana said...

Okay, that was funny. I agree with the rest...she's not buying it.

thecrazysheeplady said...

Yeah, um, good luck with that.

The Barn Door said...

Hahaha!! That cute kitty looks to innocent to ever do any of those things!!

Karen Anne said...

The brother's cat are back with their Dad? Because that is not the kitty whose photo I expected to see when I scrolled down :-)

Me and My Stitches said...

A girl can dream...

Christine said...

Oh yes they're gone. The tree wouldn't have lasted 20 minutes with those guys.